Another Rangers season sadly comes to an end, and so begins another long summer of debate and discussion about which direction the team should take, who should stay or go, how can the problems of the previous year be corrected, etc. Unlike previous seasons, the answers don't seem so clear cut, and the disagreements over the various points of contention are almost splitting the fanbase 50/50. Always the objective unbiased source, Between Periods has decided to summarize several of the topics at hand and briefly relate the arguments, both pro and con. Enjoy!

Point: Glen Sather Should Be Fired
Look at his track record during his tenure: hired two losing coaches in three years; traded young assets like Mike York, Radek Dvorak, Kim Johnsson and Tomas Kloucek; and has an unlimited budget but yet still cannot assemble a squad that shows any chemistry on a consistent basis. Most importantly, he’s failed to deliver on his two major promises: the Rangers have yet to make the playoffs in his three years as General Manager, and he has done very little to restore respectability to this Original Six franchise. Slats must go.

Counterpoint: All Hail Lord Sather
Bow before me, puny mortal, for I am Supreme Lord Sather! Tyrant of the Frozen Ponds, Master of Madison Square Garden, Emperor of the Underworld, and Scourge of the NHL! The league trembles at my command! Pillager of the Penurious, Spoliator of the Small Market, Flayer of the Fiscally Responsible, Batterer of the Bankrupt! Kneel before my might! I will have all your stars! Resistance is futile! Fire me? Insolent dog! I will eat your soul! Grovel for forgiveness, worm, lest your destruction be long and gruesome. For I am Lord Sather! Roooaaaaaaaarrrrrrrr!

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Point: Mike Keenan Should Not Be The Rangers Next Coach
He may be the only coach that has won a Stanley Cup for the New York Rangers in the past 60 years, but since then his success has greatly diminished. After leaving the Rangers, quite underhandedly mind you, his stops in St. Louis, Vancouver, and Boston have all proven fruitless, if not destructive, and after little over a year he's again worn out his welcome in another town. Iron Mike’s tenure is normally marked by internal organizational bickering and a massive gutting of fan favorite stars in favor of worn veteran players. For an team that clearly needs to come out from under the shadow of 1994, hiring back this former coach would be a step in the wrong direction.

Counterpoint: Electricity Is the Tool of the Devil
Things were so much better in the past. I say flippity-floo on these kids today. In my day we didn’t have singers like that 50 Cent character and that little hootchy-kootch tramp Shakira. We had good music, like Ace of Base, Blind Melon, and the Crash Test Dummies. And these reality TV shows and those graphic serial dramas with all this cussing and nekkidness and lascivious behavior. In my day we had wholesome family classics, like “Party of Five” and “Melrose Place”. And the clothes these youngsters wear nowadays? Everything all tight and revealing. Give me a good dirty t-shirt and a pair of torn jeans from the thrift store any day of the week. Thank God that at least Mark Messier is still around to show these kids how to play the game of hockey the right way. Flippity floo!

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Point: Eric Lindros Should Be Killed Execution Style
Eric Lindros should be dragged out behind the lot of the Rangers Westchester practice facility and shot in the back of the head with a high-caliber handgun by two thick-set well-dressed men of Italian descent. His body should then be stuffed in the back of a black sedan and driven to a remote part of northern New Jersey to be buried in a shallow ditch somewhere outside the swampy Meadowlands. Another idea would be to strangle him from behind with a thin cord of piano wire, dismember his corpse with a meat saw and use concrete blocks to sink his remains somewhere deep in the Hudson River. Either way, I want him dead.

Counterpoint: Eric Lindros Should Be Tortured, Crucified, and Then Killed
Quick, execution-style death is too good for this friggin' guy. He should be forced to construct a giant cross made of all the broken sticks he shattered while amassing his 137 penalty minutes and then shamefully paraded down Broadway as disgruntled Rangers fans pelt him with rotten fruit and used batteries. His spongy and oft-concussed head should be affixed with a crown of thorns made from the broken shards of every bobble-head doll sold in the MSG gifts stores. Lastly, he should be nailed to his giant cross and displayed on the promenade of Madison Square Garden as a warning to any other former superstar turned deadbeat that decides to come to New York for a quick paycheck and a two-year vacation.

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Point: Brian Leetch Should Not Be Resigned
Yeah, the guy is a great player and a Garden legend, but he’s also been the backbone and most visable member of six straight losing teams. And he’s 36 years old, with his best days behind him. He doesn’t have the right personality to be a team leader, the desire to compete seems to be waning, and his payroll demands are sure to be astronomical. He’s totally soft in his own zone, gets pushed off the puck too easily, and he cheats coming out of the corners. And for a power play quarterback, supposedly one of the best in the game, the Rangers power play was pretty darn miserable for most of the season. Maybe it’s time to cut Brian Leetch loose and give the spotlight to someone else.

Counterpoint: Are You &%$*# Nuts?!!!
Seriously, dude, are you out of your !?%$ mind? It’s Brian %#$& Leetch, the greatest *!#% Ranger of all %$#& time. He’s the best &%#$ player on the team right now, maybe the best &#%$ defenseman in hockey. You don’t let a !%&$ guy like that walk the %$#& away for &#!$ nothing. %$#&, I mean, it’s not like he’s Tom %$#& Poti or something. This is Brian %$#& Leetch. He's one &%$# season away from leading the &$#% Rangers in all-time *#$& scoring! Leetch %$#& rules! &%#%!

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Point: The Rangers Are Moving In the Right Direction
Sure, this season didn’t go as expected, but enough things went right to give hope for next season. Mike Dunham has emerged as not only a capable goaltender but as a steady and at times brilliant backstop with stats that rival some of the league’s best. The trades for Anson Carter and Alexei Kovalev brought two legitimate stars into the fold without sacrificing any of the Rangers future. Players like Tom Poti, Matthew Barnaby and Dale Purinton all had career (or close to career) years, while youngsters Jamie Lundmark and Dan Blackburn continue to develop. Petr Nedved rebounded nicely, while Eric Lindros stayed healthy. Bobby Holik and Darius Kasparaitis recovered from awful starts to contribute regularly. And Glen Sather seems to found the right buttons to push to get the team motivated and inspired to compete hard every night. Bad year, sure, but great future. Look out next season, NHL!

Counterpoint: Marijuana Should Not Be Legalized
Ignore the statistics and the mountain of evidence about the health and behavioral risks for a moment—how marijuana use contributes to a score of diseases, it’s role as a gateway drug to harder addiction, and the amount of crime that it inspires. The ultimate evil about perpetual marijuana use is that it lulls you into a false state of euphoria, surrounds you with a skewed vision of reality, and slows your cognitive skills to the point of debilitation. You can’t think straight, everything seems “groovy” or “rad”, you become clouded in a haze of hallucination and fantasy. Marijuana use impairs your judgment and your ability to make coherent, logical thoughts and statements. Put down the bong, friend, and come back into the real world. Just say no.

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