Hockeybird.com: They Put The Fun In Dysfunctional!

Everything is swell in Rangerville, thanks for asking! This team and it's fans have many of the pillars of happiness and success covered right now. For instance...

Self-Confidence
Brian Leetch in the NY Post: "I certainly expect to be much better... I'm still having trouble with the mental part of the game, and that's very disappointing to me... I've found it difficult to maintain my concentration on every single shift... I haven't been reacting instinctively, it's very, very aggravating... I don't expect this. Actually, I'm pretty angry about it."

(I hope the training staff went to his hotel room and confiscated his belts before they let him out of their sight after practice yesterday afternoon.)

Harmony
Sather on Anson Carter in the NY Times: "Very little effort, very little skating, no shots... You have to put in the effort... He hasn't been doing anything, and I haven't the foggiest idea why not. I've tried him everywhere."

Carter replies: "I disagree. You have to have the puck to shoot. And the effort has definitely been there. I'm just getting no breaks. Sometimes it happens."

Wisdom
John Dellapina on Greg de Vries in the Daily News: "Greg de Vries took the money and makes no apology for it. But he believed that, in leaving perennial contender Colorado to sign a four-year, $13 million contract with the Rangers last July, he also took a step toward emerging as a point-producing NHL defenseman. So far, things haven't worked out the way de Vries envisioned."

Health
The Star Ledger on Eric Lindros: "The blood that has clouded Lindros' vision is gone, and if his eye responds well to the bike ride, Lindros could return to the lineup Sunday when the Rangers play host to the Ottawa Senators."

(I'm no opthamologist, I wasn't even certain how to spell the word without looking it up, but how strange does it sound for the recovery of an eye injury to hinge on a bike ride? Lindros' body is like a game of Jenga. The guy could probably injure his hair.)

A Positive Outlook
Leeds in Fantasy Hockey News, "When does baseball season start anyway?"

There were also two other articles, one from Newsday and one from the Journal News, but I couldn't work them into my theme. Bastards.

Hysterical! Excellent news delivery.

Posted by: wsc3 on November 20, 2003 07:12 AM

I know it was just a joke, but the reason why lindros' injury is effected by the bike ride is simply to test that it can handle the stress of excerise...if the eye isn't healed and you jump back into excerising full speed, you can retear the injury

same concept as making a guy go thru a light workout after a concussion to see how he reacts, the workout isn't helping the injuries it just gages the recovery

Posted by: leetch3 on November 20, 2003 10:45 AM

When you and Rightbug do the news I open my browser and check Hockeybird.....I read it and think to myself, "Wow, when did Hockeybird get funny again ?"

And then I remember it's you guys.

Great work Dude !

----}-

Posted by: Bird on November 20, 2003 11:23 AM

Lindros could "injure his hair" That's gold Rocha. Gold!

Posted by: TimW1994 on November 20, 2003 01:35 PM

Forget the articles, I love the commentary!!!! "Injure his hair" was hilarious, absolutely hysterical.

Posted by: Daria on November 20, 2003 08:53 PM