Ugh. After an impressive four game unbeaten streak with wins over Ottawa, Tampa and the ghetto stripmall supermarket with half-empty shelves known as the Pittsburgh Penguins, the Rangers dropped both ends of a home-and-home series against the Toronto Maple Leafs, 2-4 and 4-5, respectively. Talk about being someone's date in the prison shower. Even the atrocious refs were snickering at us, at least when they weren't OPENLY INJURING OUR TOP PLAYERS (see below). "Whaddaya gonna do," shrugged Lord Admiral Glen Sather. He then pinned both losses strictly and solely on Anson Carter before walking away to place a half-dozen bids on eBay for old suits worn by Peter Falk in "Columbo." Sometimes I hate being a Rangers fan.
The Dude or Jussi?
Jussi Markkinanen was the goalie of record in the impressive win over Ottawa, the stunning shutout against Tampa, and the this-isn't-really-fair win over the Pens, while an unspectacular (and probably still sore) Mike Dunham was less than impressive in the tie against Florida and the first loss to Toronto. A surly Dunham then gave a surprisingly un-dude-like interview after the loss on Sunday, sounding as if someone just peed on his rug. The Jussmeister then got the start last night but was quickly pulled after allowing three quick goals; Dunham filled in decently but was credited with the loss. Does this sound like a potential goalie controversy? Will Jussi usurp The Dude? And where does Dunham's groin fit into all this? Stay tuned.
Don't Make Chris Simon Angry
Now is the time in my column when I run out of things to say so I check the Player Rater to see who's where. Chris "Circus" Simon is the #6 forward in fantasy hockey. Virtually absent in the past five games and reduced to a fourth-line role, the big guy played all of five minutes last night, sank a goal and took 36 freakin' minutes in penalties. Otherwise our stud line of Bobby Holik (#18), en fuego Martin Rucinsky (#32), and Retro Alex Kovalev (#40) continues to give teams fits at both ends of the ice. Rosie and Holik have been snagged in almost every league, and as a line they were productive even in the two Rangers losses. Pray that Overlord Sather does not inexplicably break them up.
Sigh
Mark Messier is leading the Rangers in goal scoring right now, and I guess at #90 on the Rater it makes him fantasy worthy. Frankly I don't know what to make of this. I don't dislike Messier (quite the opposite) and I want to see him be as successful and productive as possible, but on the same note -- how do I put this? -- I think it does more harm than good. Anyway, it's kind of a moot point because when they weren't completely boning the Rangers with the calls, one of the refs decided to stick his leg out and trip Messier, injuring his leg. Maybe it's serious, maybe it's nothing. It shouldn't really matter. Mark Messier is going to score 40-50 points this season, hardly noticibly in the FHL.
Who Sucks!
Hey, Petr Nedved! Antichrist! One point in your last five games, -3 on the season, and you've only scored in two games in the last ten! Hopefully 10% more of you decide to waive this FHL cancer and get his ownership number around 60%, at which point he'll start his satanic point-per-game production again. The other Ranger who's been thoroughly awful all year is Tom Poti. I want to remain positive about TP because he can genuinely play (unlike a lot of the fluke defensive scorers currently ahead of him), but he's just not contributing anything right now. Nothing. Zero. Nada. So waive away if you must. But if they pair him back up with Leetch and thereby decide to abandon defensive hockey and lose every other game, Poti will start to score again.
Whatever Else
Must mention Eric Lindros and Brian Leetch too. Lindros isn't playing bad, though far from dominant, and his FHL numbers aren't awful, given the weird injuries. If he stays heathy he'll be a top 30 forward. Brian Leetch, rising like a missile up the defensive scoring list (points in six straight) will still produce at a high rate so long as he continues to live as an undead creature of the night. And, lastly, because I myself pressed the "Add Player" button, ignoring the warning signs of vomit bubbling in my mouth and my head involuntarily hitting itself against the coffee table, now that I'm the proud owner of Vlad Malakhov he's had a single assist and been a minus player in three of the last four games. I am soooooooo stupid.
Next Game, Thursday, Isles
Because the 'ol Attention Deficit Disorder has been kicking in lately and I'm distracted by things like Paris Hilton, Golden Tee 2004, and the Aqua Teen Hunger Force DVD, I just noticed that the Rangers are actually ahead of the Islanders in the standing right now (albeit still out of playoff position). Not only that, the Isles are 2-8 in their last ten. Maybe Mike Milbury can lobby the league to let Garth Snow wear that 4 x 6 chest protector again. Anyway, these matchups are always fun, even when both teams kinda suck. Let's Go Rangers.
Posted by Brian at December 04, 2003 03:59 PMeMail this entry!
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